The Video Sampler

9.12.2006

Life Management Failure

September 12, 2006 Tuesday 10:58PM Life Management Failure

"the thing about being wrong, is that you can 
become correct fairly easily"

   One would think that someone scientifically minded and whom likes 
to collect data wouldn't have so much trouble keeping track of those daily,
weekly and monthly matters that make up life. Well, the parts of
life that have to do with dealing with bills, meals, transportation and other
civil requirements.
   The first step in making things better is acknowledging failure
in the first place. Only then can any progress be made to correct
the problems. I wouldn't say they are easy or offer up one time one shot
solutions but would rather acknowledge that the basic way in which
I run the mechanics of living have to be altered if I am to pull
off anything. 
   I don't feel good about anything. I don't feel good about people either.
Not right now. I've fallen into a vicious slump and attempting to put
the pieces back together in order to climb out. 
The thing about bad news is that it just becomes news after a while.
And you have to move on with the knowledge that you'll deal. 
I'll deal with things. And in the future I won't think so much about
them because I have dealt with them before. 
   In the end, all I can do is grow. In the end, all I can do is adapt
and learn new skills in order to pull through even harder times.
The greatest mistake so far hasn't really been, not know what to do...
but not given sufficient effort in doing what I know should be and has
to be done. 
   I can think of nothing more shameful than to be the same person whom
could pull of complex computer simulations but still mess up a food budget.  

My energies just haven't been in those mundane daily rituals of economics 
life. 
They have to be now. It's time things changed.
And I'm already reeling from earlier shocks in the month.
I can't take any more bad luck.
I'm going to spend every minate and make every decision in order
to fix it all. 

...
And then, come back to the real work of my life.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well.. I feel you on this.. just gonna keep on living.

Hmm.. I think you're headed in the right mental direction.
:-)

Peace be with you, sir,
-Louis II

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