The Video Sampler

10.30.2006

I Mourn the Loss of my October

October 30, 2006 Monday I Mourn the Loss of my October
It started as a cube.



Want to play with the blend file? Here's a link to 
creaturehead.blend 268 kb


Thinking Economy I think there is still a place for thinkers in the economy of civil life. I recall speaking to my biology teacher during the summer about how someone could write up the theories and experimetns and have someone else test them. I noted that theorists are important people too. It should all add into the argumnet for more thinkers and specify that thinkers and thinking is an important enough of a matter to really... well think about. ... Oh yeah, I was walking through the library last night and I stopped to stare at the chalk board. ... I wondered what to put on it.. as I tend to do that sort of thing when a large clean chalk board presents itself to me. I started writing out a way to represent algebraic symbols via computer data structures... and someone wound up proving that the distributive property only works for the exponent of 1 and no other exponent. ... eh it's all a bit hazy now but it was a minor interesting thing that happened. 9:48 PM I Mourn the Loss of my October I do. October is nearly over and Halloween is about to occur and I have not settled down to enjoy one bit of it. .... Though I suppose I sort of watched on. While on those day time rides, watching as decorations greeted me from steps, while I rode my bike along. I suppose I took something in. .. But nothing that would compare with what my imagination could concoct or remember. ... Memories of Halloween holidays long past come back in fragments. ... A fireplace mantel with ceramic ghost figures and jack-o-lanterns. Stories I wrote while back in high school. Images from Halloween specials I once watched on TV. None now. No TV, no Halloween specials. No trick-or-treating to look forward to. ... It may as well be as though Halloween didn't exist. Perhaps, that is my attitude towards all of the holidays now. Maybe, even my birthday for I do not acknowledge it the way I 'could'. ... But Halloween... this death of such a dream that I enjoyed so throughly in the past is the deepest dagger in my heart. Halloween and the Octoberish month was the beacon in my childhood life. The dissolution of which.... marks the end. And the beginning of a catastrophe of barren future ahead. Ouch. .... But still I remember what I always wished I could have come back to. Perhaps, if school was not pestering me I would have turned my energies more towards the holiday spirit rather than away from it. And someday really have those Halloweenish type adventures I always seemed to write about or dream of. .. eh. My imagination is certainly a large place. I've been lost in it for quite some time. Am I becoming the Scrooge of Holidays? In all my haste I must have lost something more precious, something sparkling beneath a locked and padded box. It must be that endless longing for the dream like qualities of a getaway I'd call Halloween Holiday Spirit. No. I couldn't lose that. It's still there, I bet, or else why would I be mourning my lost Ocotober? I ripped myself off, merely glancing in passing without taking the time to take it in. I did think about curving. I did think about costume, but now I do not believe I'll be wearing one tomorrow. ... What can I say to myself? Next year?
It needs better eyes.

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