The Video Sampler

8.31.2007

Worry

August 31, 2007 Friday Worry

Don't worry right? Well, that's hard sometimes and as the pain in my tooth slowly fades. I'm glad but not quite relieved to be done with todays round of fillings. More to come, I'm just glad the cleaning and the dental work can get doen 'before' the insurance runs out.


And later.... I hear them talk about their experiences... and I feel left out. Way left out and I think... I don't like this and I don't want to be around when this is happening. I have none and I walked home thinking about it. And then as I often do.. I turned to more productive less vacous matters.

Such as...
How to teach recent computer programming student the open source ropes. I want to take what someone begins to learn in a class and get them ready to be involded with various open source projects. I feel it's an important next step, for them and for the open source community.

But if today is worry. Than I have much of it. I worry about the 'what if's the what if I can't stand the aloneness like was once able to? And I was. I have often walked between extremes from social to solitary. And I've been back and forth amoung these choices.... and from what I've expereinced... I can see reasons to give it up...
However, I can see reasons to join the group.
Which will ultimatly win with me?

I can not know.

But you bet, I'll be playing a melancholy melody while I figure it out.

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