The Video Sampler

11.19.2007

Loss

November 19, 2007 Monday Loss

How as I do know just how much focus I would lose over the loss of a good friend. A friend I had looked forward to doing so much with. A friend whom cheered me up so much in the brief time that I had known her. This is truly a social disaster and I find it hard for myself to get over the loss.

I find myself with a wandering mind when I know I should be focused. I find myself feeling tired and drained of life from thinking about the loss. I find it hard to focus on my self assigned (but very important) tasks. And I find it troubling that I feel unable to work knowing that there are people whom hate me living in the world.

It wasn't always like this. I was once optimistic and alive with possibilities and it never seemed like friends were things to loss. I know now for I have been broken from my dreamy slumber and it appears that the signifier 'friend' holds a lot more weight than I ever thought.

I suppose now I will have to force myself deeper into my own work.... to escape the mess I have made of social worldly things.

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